London to Jo'berg

I wanted this to be hard, right?

Be careful what you wish for.

Not only did I get bumped from my first flight yesterday, but that would seem like a walk in the park on a beautiful day compared to my travel complications today.

I almost wish I had just missed the flight today.

I arrived, 2 hours early, and got in line.  Knowing that I have an oversized bag, I prepared as best as I could and made it under the 30kilos weight limit that I had double-checked online. I put the three books I brought along with my Bible, and all of my toiletries in one bag. Being compact paper and liquid products, the bag was pretty heavy, about 15kilos.  Since I was allowed 2 bags on this flight I wasn’t worried.  So I walked up to the counter and told the woman I had two bags and put the smaller one on the scale.  Great, next bag.  Apparently there is a combined 20kilo weight limit for the ticket that I had bought.  Wow.  Alright, what is the fee to put the bags on as I have them…. Oh about 800pounds!!! This is where I started to panic.  There was another option, I could go to the basement (yes, airports have basements. I didn’t know either), and pay a cargo company about 150pounds to ship it separately, to arrive in a week or so.  Yeah, that doesn’t help, considering I am 2 hours from the airport where I am staying and have no means of transportation.  Neither do I have any money.  Or any way of contacting someone that I trust or who might be able to actually help me. While I was trying to run the options through my head, the woman, who was still holding my passport and my travel documents, asked me if this June 30^th flight was my return date?  I said yes, and she said- so where is your visa?  Before I could even answer, she says “you are about to have a problem with customs” and walked off.  What the…?!  So now I am really freaking out.  I know about the visa situation, I have been over that I million times.  But the woman has my passport!  She comes back and before she can even speak I just tell her not to worry about the visa, please just help me to get onto this flight.  South African Airways personnel are terribly impersonal, unhelpful, and make you feel really stupid for not knowing the ins and outs of their company policies.  So I didn’t really know what to do and, mind you, I was being sent from counter to counter, handed over to so many different people, none of whom wanted to help in any way. At all. In the least.

What I decided to do, after saying a quick prayer, was go with the best chance I had and put as much weight into my back pack and purse as possible and then pay the fee to get my big bag on the flight, and carry the second bag I had packed.  I went on to do that and got back in another line.  My bag was weighed, and I was 9kilos over the limit of 20.  That was the best I was going to do and so I just wanted to get it over with, I was sweating trying to carry 90kilos worth of my ife back and forth from line to line, and I wasn’t even yet on my 12 hour flight. I am going to look awesome when I land. I was then told to go to another line to pay.  Bring the bags.  I paid then went back to the other line, bring the bags, to finally get my boarding pass and get rid of this crap.  Ok, “do you have any liquids in any of your carryon bags? Of which, by the way, you are only allowed two, miss.”

WHA?

I hadn’t even thought of the bag I had packed with my books and toiletries- that I was just going to carry on because of the weight charge! Oh my goodness, I can’t even believe this.  Bring the bags over to the side.  “Miss, you can’t do this here. Please take your bags all the way down to the other end of this huge room we are in and make sure you hurry because even though you are checked in you are going to be bumped from the flight if you cant get this done and be back at the counter in 12 minutes.”  Awesome.  Yeah, no problem, don’t help, just stare at me and point to the area I am supposed to go. Treat me like a 5 year old in a time out.  “You know miss, you really should try to get here much earlier. You are really cutting in close, you cant just show up and walk right onto the plane anymore, its not very smart of you.”  You have got to be kidding me?! Now you want to lecture me? Nice. Real nice.  How about I punch you right in your smug face?

Ok. Reel it in. Don’t lose it.  You wanted this to be hard.  There you go.

I pulled my bags over to the corner, threw liquids in, took as much as would fit back in the small bag and threw it in.  Then I consolidated the contents of my backpack and my purse into just my purse- which my mom warned me before I left not to over pack.

I did the best I could, and had 2 minutes to spare by the time I reached yet another counter.  I threw my bag up there. Got it checked in and pulled it to the over sized luggage station. I thought I was home-free, or at least close to having a few minutes to sit at the gate- my flight wasn’t leaving for another hour. I was much mistaken however.  When I had gotten myself through security and was fully clothed again, I looked up at the signs to be pointed in the right direction- to gate 56.

1.3 miles later.  “We are now boarding rows 69-77, please have your passports open….”

So here I sit.  Row 70, seat A.  The best part about the whole thing so far is that I have a window seat, and I am next to a very tiny woman.

They are powering up the engines...let's see how much sleep I get. ha right.