The Easter Vacation Novel- One Day at a Time

Where to even start!  I am safely home from a whirlwind tour of Southern Africa.  It was an amazing trip that I was able to share with even more amazing people. I have so much to tell you, so I guess I will just start from the beginning.

Day One, Saturday, April 4th- Travel to Joberg.

I was not in a great place the day that my “vacation” was to be starting. I had been having serious stomach issues for a few days and it was only getting worse the morning of my flight to Johannasberg. The night before I left I was completely miserable, I couldn’t even imagine surviving a flight and then hopping on a bus tour for 7 days! It wasn’t looking like I was going to be able to make it on a plane so I made an emergency doctors appointment and got on some drugs fast. Turns out I had a pretty knarly Lower Intestinal Infection, I was super dehydrated, and had been running a fever. Great way to start my vacation.

Anyhow, I filled my prescription on the way to the airport. I was a little worried about missing my flight- we were running late now. Turns out, I didn’t have any reason to worry because my flight was delayed 2 hours. I got a free meal voucher as an apology from the airline, but I knew my stomach wasn’t ready for food, let alone airport food so I skipped out and just waited patiently. I was starting to feel a little better, but the moment I stood up to board the plane I knew it was going to be a long hour and ten minutes. Man was I right. I have never been so miserable traveling, and I am pretty sure I was making the people in my aisle a little nervous.

When I landed, late, I was worried that my pre-planned ride to the lodge wouldn’t be there any longer, and I was right. I called the lodge and they told me not to worry, that someone was on their way to find me.  Three hours later they showed up.

By the time I finally got to the lodge I was so exhausted and really sick, but it all went away for a few minutes in my excitement to see Victoria!  I was so happy to see her, but after checking in with the tour group and getting plans set for the morning I hit the sack and passed out hard.

Day Two, Sunday, April 5th- Leaving Joberg

 I woke up early on Sunday morning and had some time by myself. I tried to use the computers at the lodge to post an entry, but it kicked me off before I was done writing and could post. I grabbed a muffin and some juice with Victoria, Sarah and Betsy. Sarah and Betsy work for an NGO called Samaritan’s Purse in Maputo, Mozambique. Victoria brought them and Chris, a teacher from Vicotria’s school. She teaches a bunch of stuff- Chemistry, Health, The Bible, and he teaches Math so they have become good friends too.

We hit the road just before 730am and started the first, very long leg, of our journey. Around noon we made a stop, in true South African fashion, on the side of the road, under a very lonely tree, for some lunch.  Then it was back on the road.  We ended up driving all day, crossing out of South Africa at the Groblersbrug border crossing and reaching Palapyeto in Botswana stay for the night.  The 12 hours straight of driving helped force us all to get to know each other and our group was pretty incredible. Apart from the 5 of us, there were 5 nurses from Canada who had just finished their 2 month residency in Northern Mozambique, and 3 Peace Corps members who had been evacuated out of Madagascar recently and would soon be returning home after having to cut their 2 year contracted stay short. There was also a couple from Australia who just love to travel, and another Aussie- Gavin, who was taking a year off from working in finance to travel and see the world. It was a very nice troop of humanitarians.  Every one looked out for and respected one another, and it made for a very enjoyable atmosphere. Our dinner at the campsite was incredible and just added to the anticipation of great things to come.

Day Three, Monday, April 6th- Keep up the Driving

Another early morning and quick breakfast got us moving further north and west through Francistown, Nata, Gweta, and then finally into Maun just outside of the Okavango Delta.  We pulled into the campground and set up our tents. Another amazing dinner and a hot shower was all that was keeping us from hitting the sack early to be ready for the trek into the Delta the next day.

Day Four, Tuesday, April 7th- This time, we will move ourselves

It had been two straight days of driving and I was getting restless. My stomach had settled and I was really ready to not be in the seated position any more than I had to. Needless to say I was ecstatic to hear we were about to spend 3 full days in the middle of absolutely no where with only our feet and our makoros as means of transportation.

We were picked up at the crack of dawn and drove for over an hour to reach the waters edge. On our way we had to cross the buffalo fence that actually runs nearly the entire length of the Africa continent to keep the buffalo from entering into farming territory. The fence is minimal, but extensive in its length and is used for the sole purpose of keeping hoof and mouth disease, of which buffalo are carriers, from eradicating all of the cows in Africa.

Once we got to the water, it was just a matter of minutes before our gear was unloaded and packed into the waiting makoros. A makoro is a boat traditionally carved from a single piece of wood from the trunk of the Sausage tree. For a single boat to be made, a tree needs to be at least 80 years old in order to be large enough for carving. Unfortunately, the Sausage tree is not entirely water proof and the lifespan of a makoro is about 7-10 years. Not exactly a resource conserver, so many makoro polers have switched to fiberglass boats. No matter- Frank (Muhomutz by his tribal name- which is what we called him) was a great poler and we reached the campsite after about an hour.

It was incredible. We all were amazed at our surroundings: The power of the sun and the water. The height of the reeds and the crystal clearness of the water. The skill of our polers who seems to have no problem negotiating each other and finding just the right channels (each only about a foot wide) to get us to our camp.

It being the third day of our tour we had the “setting up camp” thing down to a science and were enjoying the afternoon in no time. Afternoon is a relative term, and in this part of the world it consists of siesta-ing between the hours of 10am and 4pm when the sun is just too hot to do anything. We spent the day relaxing, swimming, learning to pole a makoro, and then got ready for our sunset bush walk.

We left promptly at 5pm, in small groups traveling in separate directions, with our own guides. Our guide for the evening was Timba. The walk was a short one, just under 2 hours, and we were only gone long enough to see the sun dip below the horizon. Once that happens, the ground immediately starts to cool and everything starts to come alive again, and everything is hungry. Everything includes lion. We moved quickly and in very tight formation back to camp. It was AWESOME.

Day Four, Wednesday, April 8th- The Long Bushwalk

When the announcement was made that we would be waking up at 5:00am again, it was clear that there was going to be a pattern on this tour: Early nights, and even earlier mornings.  This day proved to have reason for the early start, and was totally worth it.

We had the choice of a short, medium, or long morning bushwalk. Naturally, Victoria and I wouldn’t be caught dead on anything but the full-out longest bush walk you can sign up for. Which is exactly what we got. We left at 5:30 and were supposed to return at 9:30am so we could enjoy a proper breakfast and be out from under the sun before it got too intense.

Our group was lucky. Since we chose the long walk, we took a few makoros off the island that housed our campsite and went to another piece of wilder land (if that was even possible). Well, once we hit land we walked, non-stop, off trail, seemingly towards nothing, surrounded by incredible nothing, and every moment was breath-taking. I wish I could use up all of the bandwidth allowed for this month to post pictures and give you an idea of what I am talking about (click the link at the top of the page for a few choice photos). Victoria was freaking out the whole time that we were literally in the middle of nothing. There was nothing in the distance but the sun and grass. There was nothing where we were but the sun and grass. And if we had to get back to camp, there was just absolutely no way we could have found our way.  Good thing we had the coolest guide ever to keep us safe and keep track of where in the world we were. C-Company was his name, don’t ask me where that came from, but his village was a 10 day makoro ride from this spot in the delta where he worked. Many of the indigenous people here who work with foreigners will chose a random name or phrase and use that in place of their actual name which is usually too difficult for most people to say without completely butchering it. I usually ask if I can do my best with their real names, but C was cool.  He was literally too cool for school. I was a little intimidated, and I found out why. C was actually descendant of the Masai. This tribe is really the only untouched African tribe left on the whole continent. They are the glamorized African tribesmen you see on TV with the big hoops in their ears and lips. They are the only people allowed to hunt the animals without permit or persecution and they live completely off of the land. They wear basically nothing and walk barefoot through the bush with spears taller than they are- which is saying something because they are the tallest people group to be found anywhere in Africa. It was really fun trying to keep step with him. We walked with him casually through the bush, as if we were walking down the street, and you’d think he was moving at a snail’s pace if not for the fast that for every step he took we each took three to just keep up.

3 hours in we saw him: a beautiful bull elephant moving into denser bush just 100 meters away. We started to follow him, but he went into a group of trees that would have put us on dangerous territory, so we decided to stop.  Fortunately, we weren’t far from the next sighting. Just across a valley and on the other side of a small pond were 2 more large, very old, bull elephants. We crept our way across to them, scaring a lone female wildebeest in the process. As we neared the elephants Victoria really started to freak out. We stopped about 50 yds away and sat within some brush just watching them. When the wind changed and the elephants were alerted to our presence, Victoria was ready to go. All the while I have the biggest grin on my face and I want to dance- I held off (only for a few minutes lol). When they started to walk toward us, we stayed very still and very quiet. When they reached the ground not 20 yds from where I stood, we had to back away. They walked calmly by and towards the water, and it was so fantastic. Two old friends out for a morning stroll. Beautiful. I was giddy and got to do my little dance.

We walked out of the area and took a break for water. We hadn’t realized until then that the sun was getting up there and that the long sleeves were coming off. I glanced at my watch and it was already 9am! We started to head quickly back to camp and didn’t even turn to look back (except to take photos with an elephant skeleton) until we had reached the makoros that had taken us out at 5:30. C had brought us straight back, as the crow flies, not at all the way we had walked out, to the amazement of each of the 5 in our little hardcore bushwalkers group.  The whole experience was fascinating and exhausting. We returned to camp the only group to have seen anything and enjoyed our hard earned breakfast and nap.  The rest of the day was much like the first, swimming and relaxing and enjoying the wildness and quiet of the place. That evening we took another bushwalk for the sunset and danced the night away with the locals teaching us song and dance full of rhythm and life. There is no way my words can do justice to the awesomeness of that day.  Chris took video, which I hope to some day get my hands on. The whole thing was completely out of this world, genuine, and so fun.

The entire time we were in the delta we had a full moon and stars that reached all the way to the horizon. You could hear the jackals and crickets singing at night and nothing else for miles.

Day Five, Thursday, April 9th Leaving the Delta

The early morning routine was the same, with our last sunrise bushwalk. I decided to stay at camp to have some devotion time after realizing that I hadn’t been alone since arriving at the beginning of February. We had coffee and biscuits, packed up camp and makoro-ed right back to the edge of the delta to our awaiting ride back to main camp.  We were given the option of taking a flight over the delta and Victoria and I couldn’t resist. When are we ever going to be back here?

I could have skipped it to be honest. It was really beautiful, don’t get me wrong, and the sheer size of the thing made me wonder how we saw any animals in the first place, but it wasn’t the best hour of my life. It was a cute little single prop, 6 seater, with no air circulation in the back- which is where my seat happened to be. Pair that with the plane being lighter than the air currents pushing it up and down at any given time, and of course with a stomach on the short end of recuperating from sickness, that by the time we landed I was a different color entirely from when we took off.  Naturally, it was time to get back on the bus to head east for Kasane.

The drive was too long to do in one day, so we stopped in Gweta for the night.

Day Six, Friday, April 10th- More driving, of course

 The whole day was driving, right up until about 4pm when we reached Kasane. We set up camp and were promptly picked up for a sunset wildlife cruise of the Zambezi River along the shores of Chobe National Park. It would have been a great chance to actually see the wildlife- being a wildlife cruise, except for the 30 spring breakers from Cape Town sharing the boat with us who apparently didn’t get the memo because they had been drunk since they left school.  We did manage to see some birds, including the Great African Fish Eagle.  When we made our way up the river we came to a bank where there were a pod of hippo and an elephant. It was beautiful. I was having a great time, trying to ignore our rowdy company and focus on the click of my camera when I discovered the last straw. A small family boat near to us saw my enthusiasm and said to me “you guys are just too late, you missed the leopard”.  I was just a little pissed- knowing that it was the raucous our crew caused that scared the rarest seen animal in Africa away and I had missed my chance to get a glimpse.  When we were nearing the next bend I couldn’t help myself and yelled at the entire boat to please be quiet, that some of us had paid to see the animals, not to get wasted and scare them away.  I felt a little bad about it, apart from the 4 apologies I got and the support of my entire tour group. That is, I felt bad until one of the girls in the drunk group fell over a bunch of chairs.  It was ridiculous. Spring break 2009, wahooo! idiots.

Day Seven, Sat, April 11th- Chobe, truck break down, off to Vic Falls

 5 pages into this post and I think you know the next sentence:  Another early morning.

We were picked up at 5:30 am for a morning game drive through Chobe National Park. The drive could have been better, it was very crowded and most of what we saw was impala- the “fast food” of the bush. Its everywhere and everything eats it, and funnily enough it has a white “M” painted on its backside. Other sightings included koudu, buffalo, hippo, warthog, fox, and vulture.

After the game drive we were set to head for Victoria Falls, but our truck broke down for about an hour. Since our drivers are amazing they managed to make us good as new and we were off in no time. Actually, it may have been longer but I passed out on the truck the whole time- even when they were jacking it up to get underneath it! See, because we were traipsing through some of the worst Malaria zones in the country I was taking a pill to keep me from catching the nasty disease. One of the side effects is extreme sensitivity to temperature. Victoria was feeling hot all the time. When we left on our morning game drive it was really really cold and I broke out into hives! I had never had that happen before- good thing half of our group were nurses and have benadryl! After popping two of those bad boys I was out for the count.

 Unfortunately, the delay put us in Victoria Falls much too late to do much of anything. Since we weren’t advised to be outside of the gate of the backpackers after dark, we took a walk into and around town to stretch our legs before having dinner and chilling with the group before going to bed.

Day Eight, Easter Sunday, April 12- The Falls

Officially, Saturday night had been the last day of the tour so we had a great sleep in until 8:30am Sunday morning before heading to church in the residential area of Vic Falls city. The night before we had asked around and found out about Celebration Christian Church. It was the perfect start to a perfect day. We spent the whole day exploring the falls- which were too huge for words, then had a night of drumming lessons and traditional Zimbabwean food.

The only way I can describe the falls to you would be to say that there is nothing so powerful that I have ever seen that would amount to something greater than the water in that place. Even if it weren’t flooded higher than it has been since the 1960s it would still be incredible. The water is enormous and moves so fast. The sheer scale of the place is boggling and hard to comprehend. The pictures we took look fabricated and the words I could write about it sound so small. Victoria Falls is one of the seven natural wonders of the world. Having seen it, I feel an intense drive to see the other 6 if that is the standard for the beauty and wonder it takes for a place to make the very exclusive list.  I have seen some beautiful places, but this place just couldn’t have been real.

Day Nine, Monday, April 13^th- The rest of the town and get out

We used Monday as a day to see the rest of Victoria Falls. We walked around town, visited the open market and traded for souvenirs, and tried to get plans nailed down for a way home.  This proved harder than expected and made for a much more exciting, if not entirely too drawn out, trip back into South Africa.

Our travel over the course of the next two day went like this:

Monday- overnight train from Victoria Falls to Bulaweyo, Zimbabwe

Tuesday- arrive 3 hours late in Bulaweyo at 10am, find and catch an overcrowded bus to Johannesburg leaving at 1pm. Hit the SA border at 5:30, get fed up with waiting for the overcrowded bus to be cleared through customs, 830pm, find a new ride into the country. Get stopped 5 times in the first hour of driving into South Africa by border patrol, having to get off the bus each time to show passports and to have bags searched (things are so bad in Zim that people are crossing illegally by swimming the river then hitching rides in buses like the one we were on)

Wednesday- 3:45am arriving at a missionary guesthouse in Jo’berg. Set our alarm for 6am, call taxi to take us to bus terminal. 8:45am- get on bus to Maputo, Mozambique. 10:30- bus finally leaves after being delayed. 6pm- arrive in Maputo.

A full 48 hours of travel.  Thank the good Lord for our protection. Here are some things that Lonely Planet (a travel guidebook) had to say about our chosen (and only choices) way of traveling home:

 “Trains are very slow and the tracks and trains are in desperate need of servicing and parts. Serious accidents continue to occur.” – we found this to be true. Although our train made frequent and long stops in the middle of no where, for no apparent reason, we did not hit anything or have any actual mechanical trouble. The same train the day before was not so lucky, nor was the elephant it hit at full speed.

“In reality, train time tables are constantly changing and trains are not particularly safe for tourists and are frequently used as traveling brothels.” – we found this to be true. Though we were safely locked in our cabin the entire duration of the trip, the one time we did leave the compartment was to use the toilet (which itself served to remind us less of the worst locker room you could imagine and more of the holocaust). While I was waiting my turn it was very clear that men were getting off the train only to bring women back on with them. Sketchy things were going down, fo sho.

“Unemployment and general desperation mean its not nearly as safe as it once was” – speaking of Bulaweyo, Zimbabwe. Good thing we were only there for 3 hours.

In any case, the whole thing was worth it. By Wednesday evening Victoria was home and I was happy to accompany her. I was able to spend two full travel- free days with her and we had a fantastically healing time. I am forever in her debt for putting the whole trip together- finding the tour company, getting a group together, and including me.  She helped me to realize just how much I really needed time to myself.  The time off from work that I was able to spent this Easter break would not have been nearly as valuable without her presence. Being able to spend time with such a close friend in such a far off place did wonders for my heart. Thanks V.

Since this post is already the longest post ever in the history of blogging, I won’t write too much more.  I just want to thank you all for your prayers of safety for the trip. God was everywhere. I will be sharing more about that and more about things I was able to take from the trip when I can write more this week. Please check out some of the photos I have posted. I hope my account of the trip makes up for the lack of posting I have been able to do in the last few weeks.

One last thing.  Elections are coming up this week on Wednesday the 22^nd of April.  Durban has already seen a handful of riots and many people have been killed in the weeks leading up to this. Marches, both scheduled and spontaneous, are happening all over the city and suburbs. Students have been stabbed in their classrooms at universities. A friend of a friend was beaten to death by a 4lb hammer, stabbed twice in the heart with a screwdriver, rolled up in a carpet and set afire this past weekend by his employees who did not share his political views.  A home 4 houses up the street was attacked this past weekend- the father was shot in the shoulder (is doing fine now) and his youngest daughter (who goes to the primary school we work with) was shut in the bathroom as the house was ransacked.  I can assure you that our home is safe and well protected, but that is not to say that danger is not just outside our walls.  The team and I still leave everyday and take children to parks and reserves that are public places for anyone to use. Please pray for the safety of the team and the children in our care. Pray also for peace in Durban and other major cities of South Africa this week during elections. I don’t believe this country has ever seen a truly fair election and Dave has actually witnessed a government computer miss-tally vote numbers being directly inputted to the system right before his eyes. Please pray that the people of this country vote for its best future- not that I would be able to even start explaining who that might be. Let’s leave it in the hands of God.

Please pray also for Victoria and her continued happiness and ministry success working in Maputo with the missionary school there. Chris, Sarah, and Betsy are also in my prayers.

Ill be posting more soon. Love you all. Don’t forget to check out the pics!!

And one final thing: 

SHOUT OUT TO MOOSE- 5^th FASTED COLLEGIATE TRIATHLETE IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA!

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IM ALIVE!!!! and HE IS RISEN

Happy beautiful Easter to everyone!!!

I am in Victoria Falls on the Zimbabwe side and we are heading into the local territory for church this morning. I am really excited. We will have to cut out early, seeing as how normal Africal church is 4-5 hours long, who knows how long an Easter service would be!

I wanted to say hi to you all and share with you Easter blessings. I am safe and sound and will make sure to spend time posting all about our travels through Botswana, Zimbabwe, Mozambique, and touches of Namibia, and Zambia.

I can't wait to get it all down. Lovelovelove.

Lindsay

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Easter Break

Written 04-Apr-09


I am leaving for a bus tour in about an hour through Botswana, into Chobe National Park, and onto Victoria Falls. I have met up with my very good friend, Victoria Sisson, who has been teaching high school chemistry in Mozambigue. We grew up together at home and it is so incredible to be in this country together. Other than her, there is not a soul I know so well within 5 thousand miles.

I will make sure to have some incredible things to post at the end of this tour, we are doing and seeing a lot of the most beautiful parts of africa.

Please pray for the safety of the tour, the careful driving of our guides, and no border troubles (I refuse to pay bribes). Please also pray for my health, as I have been sick for the last few days and am on medication, but not entirely excited at the prospect of spending today on a bus with no facilities.

Love to you all. Thanks for your continued support, and be excited for my next posts (coming soon)

This is where I get kicked off the internet.....

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This Weeks Camp :) I'm Back!

Hey Everyone! Thank you so much for your continued support. Here is a back up of a few posts I haven’t been able to put up because of Internet problems. Read On!

Sunday, March 22, 2009

I just got off the phone with my mom and dad and the smile on my face feels so good.

I have been cut off from the Internet. This message has been cut and pasted from a word document for faster uploading so that I don’t spend the time typing it while using Megabytes.  The way the Internet works here is on a allotment system, meaning each home pays for a certain number of MB for the month. If you use more megs than you pay for it shuts off and you can pay a hefty overage fee for it to be turned back on, or you can wait for the start of the next month.

Apparently I was taking up more Internet than I thought. Woops!  Here I thought I was being good. I am not used to Internet being measured this way.  Now, I am completely beating myself up because we hit our 2 GB limit by the 15^h of the month because of me, I am sure. I told Dave that I want to pay the overage fee and if needed, up the monthly allotment. Such is the reason for the gap between posts.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

We arrived home from camp a bit ago and have unpacked, debriefed, and I am clean for the first time in 4 days.

The camp was nothing like the one a few weeks ago with a survival theme in mind. This was more for fun. We still broke up into 2 groups- a main camp and bush camp (like on the survival trip). But this time Adam and I were in charge of the bush camp while the rest of the team manned the main camp. So the first day, Monday, we took one group up the long way- about 12k. It was longer but not as steep as the more direct route. I decided that I would carry my pack so that the kids wouldn’t complain. I didn’t want to leave anything at the main camp so I had my Bible, devotion notebook, my camera and both lenses, 2 changes of clothes, my headlamp, toiletries, towel, socks, swimsuit, my sleeping bag, rain gear, jacket, sweatshirt, and a hat.  They had nothing to carry because we were trucking their packs to camp for them. We had a lot of fun swimming, waterfall jumping (20ft), and campfire cooking. On Tuesday morning we packed up camp, had breakfast, and started back down, the short way this time. It was much steeper, but took us passed an even higher waterfall (43ft), and about 7k. I brought my pack again.

I had thought that we would have maybe an hour or so to sit and catch our breaths, perhaps grab a bite to eat, before heading up again with the second wave. But as we arrived the kids in the second group were already lined up and waiting. I rinsed off, grabbed some fruit from the kitchen, filled my water, and within 20 minutes of arriving we were back on our way. I brought my pack, again.

Needless to say I was tired. My legs weren’t as fresh but it was important to me to be an example to the kids. Good thing too, because the second group was a pain. They were much harder to deal with, complained more, worried a lot, weren’t very enthusiastic, blah blah blah. They were wussies. It didn’t help that we decided to take the short way up. Yes, its shorter, but steeper. Der. By the time we reached the waterfall we had taken 2 breaks already. It was pretty warm so we let the kids swim in the pool at the bottom. Something had to be done. It didn’t take me long to step up.  I decided to jump it.

It was high. Nothing shorter than 30 feet will even get my heart pumping, but this one I could feel. There wasn’t a lot of water running through, but it was fast and just as the water would go over the top it hit a rock that made it splash out in all directions. Adding to the grandeur was that the face of the fall had a slight incline with different layers of rock that added to the splash. The thing was beautiful.  I had one of the teachers check everything out at the bottom to make sure I wasn’t going to land on a submerged branch or something I couldn’t see. I took a few deep breaths, enjoyed the feeling of the sun on my face, closed my eyes and smiled. I took a two-step running start and went for it. I knew I was going to have to really jump because of the rock incline and I also had to jump at an angle instead of straight out so that I could hit in the white water- the deepest part. Unfortunately the deepest part wasn’t quite deep enough and after a perfect fall and entry, hitting the bottom was a jarring experience. If it wasn’t for the incredible shooting pain through both of my ankles and up lower legs I would have been laughing. I let the force of the water push me up and after a couple claming breaths the pain subsided a little. I didn’t let on to anyone but Adam and the teachers that it wasn’t the best jump, and the kids were impressed which was the whole point so I was happy. I let my feet soak in the ice cold water, pulling them up only to flick off the occasional crab, as the kids played. By the time we got moving again I had convinced myself that it was just the shock of impact and nothing serious. When I woke up this morning with 2 times as much ankle as I had fallen asleep with, I was proven wrong.

I should have iced it, but had no ice. I should have compressed it but had no bandage. I should have elevated and rested it, but who are you kidding? I walked all that day and hiked back down this morning, again with my pack, had to help with lunch, clean camp, and do camp inspections for the girls. What can I say, I like moving more than I like my ankles.

All in all it was a great few days. My favorite part of the weekend was actually right after jumping the big fall. Naturally I had left all of my stuff at the top. When we were done I to get back to the path we had to climb out from the bottom and hike through the forest a bit. I left the group to get moving at the bottom and went ahead to get dry and change. After I had climbed through wet branches and mud, up a pretty dodgy looking wooden ladder, and reached the path I realized I was traipsing through the rainforest wearing only my swimsuit. The jarring pain shooting up my legs with every step I took was nowhere near enough to take the huge smile off my face. I was so happy for those few moments alone, I don’t think you could have put me more in my element.

Thank you Lord for your amazing creation. No one drew it, planned it, or built it. We go on worrying and fretting, planning and building. This gets left alone, almost forgotten, and it flourishes. Thank you Lord for untouched earth, it screams of you.

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Finding Equilibrium

Naturally, now that I have settled into the routine things are no longer all easy and exciting and new.  I am trying really hard to find my place on the team here, but I haven't quite put my finger on the dynamic so I am finding it confusing.  I am not really sure who I am supposed to be taking my cues from (other than Dave and Jean) because no one is giving me any. I have been on a bit of a roller coaster of excitement and discouragement for the last few days. 

There have been some really incredible opportunities for me to help the team see that high schoolers are nothing to be afraid of.  This older age group that the team is weary of and the kids that I have a deep heart for are one and the same.  Since I have been here we have worked with 3 classes from Waterfall College (a high school for "trouble" children) and the rest of the programs have all been younger than 12 years old. 

So here I am, all excited to be working with a person with whom I can have a conversation and not have to tell them to tie their shoe or blow their nose. Please don't get me wrong- I love working with the young kids.  It is fun, and hilarious, and beautiful.  But yesterday I got to speak for an hour on Creation vs. Evolution- something I can't do with a first grade class.

Tuesday and Thursday were Waterfall College kids and those were my best days of the week. On Tuesday I got to lead an Emergency Challenge after teaching the kids how to carry someone to safety and then out of the bush on a stretcher or litter.  On Thursday I had the chance of giving the message for the class before we started our activities (something Dave usually does). The message usually consists of some really good outdoor science and info, an explanation of things that usually tie into something from the class's current curriculum, and a small devotional message. Since this year marks the 200th anniversary of Darwin's "Origin of the Species" and therefore the theory of evolution, Dave has been doing the older kids' morning messages on the debate and sharing his evidence for creation.  When he asked me on Wednesday night to do the message for he following morning, I was so excited.  I took information from a bunch of different sources and sermons and conferences that I have been to, so I could put my own spin on it.  By the grace of God I had so much fun and the kids really responded to all of the information we talked about. I was surprised that half of this 9th grade class had never heard of Darwin, but still knew the definition of evolution. I know they are not the same thing, but I think that guy should be paired with the information he invented.  (want to know something funny about Darwin? read what he has to say about homosexuals. some might not be so keen to listen to his theories anymore)

Anyway, I decided I would start with the definition of fact. Did you know that within the definition of fact, the actual words "in theory" are used? Think about that for a minute. Okay.... We talked about the relativity of facts and therefore truth: everyone can have the same facts but come up with different truths because of their individual interpretation of the facts. To prove my point I told them that I thought we were in a forest. Yup, being from the midwest and having learned that a group of trees is called a forrest- I would call this a forrest.  They all told me I was wrong, that we were in the bush.  Exactly my point. 

Since we all have the same facts about evolution vs. creation- the facts being our existence and our very being alive on this planet- the area that we differ is in the interpretation of those facts.  I also made sure to quote the Bible in Matthew when it talks about not looking poorly on those who think differently than you.  I addressed the very common stereotype that Christians are people who do not see any side but their own and that they look down on people who believe differently than them.  While I have met quite a few Christians like that, I explained to the class that it is wrong and that they have every right to put someone in their place who exudes that kind of attitude. 

I shared a bunch of other stuff, like the story of how the Bible was written- mostly in a series of letters and how it was copied and shared throughout early AD, and how these copies were used to put together The Bible that we use today. I shared with them some information on classical literature and how the very same process (corroboration from textual transmission) has been used to create the published works of Homer, Socrates, and Plato (to name a famous few). It is amazing, but we have a small few hundred copies a few hundred years removed from the death of Homer to put together the Iliad. WE have 16,000+ copies of The Bible, the oldest of which are less than 100 years removed from the LIFE of the authors (meaning they were still around when these copies were). 

I also talked about the many mistakes scribes had to have made when copying letters to send for their masters.  Think about it- after a long day of work, running around in the desert sun, to have to come home and press and stick into a plat of clay to make copies. It must have been hard work just to write a couple pages, let alone many copies. Even so, the first line would have been the easiest. If anyone was going to make a mistake, it wouldn't have been in the first 5 words.....

"In the beginning, God created..."

I had so much fun talking with the kids and it was the perfect way to start the day. The teacher came up to me right after I had released the kids to Adam for their first activity, while I was putting my Bible away. Interestingly enough, some of the girls had gotten into a pretty heated debate about evolution the day prior which ended by the involvement of the head master.  The teacher was glad to have both sides so well explained, and to have the kids hear the importance of respecting each other's points of view. The team had had no previous knowledge of the incident, but God sure did.  I am so thankful for opportunities like that- the ones God is so clearly responsible for. It was a great day.

Apart from the good days this week, there have definitely been some trying ones.  I am finding myself slightly frustrated with my undefined role.  It's not that I don't have a job, it's that I don't know exactly what I am expected to do or not do.  And I don't even need it spelled out for me before hand, I just wish someone would be able to tell me as we go along. Not too big of a deal, just a small frustration.

Tomorrow is another early morning- even though it is Saturday.  I am accompanying Dave, Jean, and Jasper (the award winning hunting dog) to a test trial competition. We leave the house at 6am sharp and will be gone most of the day.  On the way home I get to attend a braii (BBQ) that is being thrown for me  by people I don't know. Haha, I was approached at a coffee shop the night of my baptism by a woman who introduced herself and said in the same sentence that I was the guest of honor on Saturday.  Love it :)  I am really excited.

So I love and miss you all and really can't believe that this blog is almost at 1000 visitors.  You guys are incredible.  Thank you so much from the very bottom of my heart.  With out your support, I very literally would not be here.  

lovelovelove

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Ruined and Healed

PREFACE

I felt the need to write a blurb warning those of you who do not know me spiritually that this one is a bit heavy.  Please do not be turned off or afraid of the words that I use or the feelings that I share in the following. I have been pretty blunt in this entry and my sincere hope is that you might better understand and possibly feel for yourself the incredible power of Christ. Please let me know if I can answer any questions or if you just want to tell me that you think I am crazy.  I know I am :)

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The human part of me was afraid, when I left on this trip, that I was just trying to run away from the sin and problems in my life back in the states. But better than me, God knew my heart. I came here with the intent to serve and do what I could to grow the kingdom. There are no words to describe the growth that has taken place in my heart since I got here just shy of a month ago. Here is my attempt at it:

God is a jealous God. No doubt. He wanted my heart, he wanted all of me.  God is rightly jealous of our affections, and I was not pouring out my affection to Him. He stole me back and took possession of what was rightly His in the first place.  In the process He has showered me with his love, his strength, and his grace.  Things that I was afraid to lose by giving them up to God have only been magnified.

I realized, through the events of the past months, that I have never really had to sacrifice for God. I have never really had to give anything up or lay anything important on the line for him.  My reputation, my sport, my relationships, my family, my livelyhood- nothing.  Nothing in my life has ever really been in jeopardy until I left on this trip.  Leaving wasn't even the hardest part- it was an adventure. I looked forward to the possible hardships and lessons I could take from it.  Little did I know that getting here was a simple first step in the complete rewriting of my life. The month that I have been here God has used to open my eyes to the ways in which I have been putting the world in front of Him.

I have been given an incredible and gracious opportunity to make a huge change in my life.  In giving up things to God that I very much wanted to keep, I have been utterly humbled by what he has given me in return.  The weightlessness of my heart and the sheer joy I feel is only something God could gift me with, only something the power of his son has made possible.

When I woke up and went to church this morning, I had no idea that it was baptism Sunday.  When the pastor mentioned it I was hit with such an intense and physical pull to be included. I immediately wished I had signed up or heard about it ahead of time or something. When the pastor went on to say that anyone called to be baptized should join right in my heart nearly leapt out of my chest.  What I couldn't make myself do though was to leap out of my chair.  I sat on the very edge of my seat when it came time for any randoms to come up, and just as I started to lean forward and stand myself up he closed with the announcement that anyone wishing to be baptized had another chance during the evening service.  After my heart had been flying around in my chest (I haven't felt that since Pac-10s) I was shaking and near to tears, very aware of this entirely physical calling I had just experienced, angry with myself for not stepping up, and thankful to the Lord for His understanding and second chance in the evening.  Turns out there were reasons for my being glued to my seat- Beauty (a worker with us on the farm) upon hearing my news also decided to muster up the courage to be baptized and before we had even left the morning service the entire family was coming to watch, document, and celebrate afterward.

"As soon as Jesus was baptized, he went up out of the water. At that moment heaven was opened, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and lighting on him.  And a voice from heaven said, "This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased." (matthew 3:16)

and Heaven was never closed again.

What an experience. I don't remember what I said into the mic after I spoke my name. Something I just read from Isaiah about being ruined and healed.

The way I see it, I was like someone who never knew defeat so never understood victory.  The last few months, being completely defeated in myself was spiritually excruciating.  Taking steps toward Jesus, carrying my cross with me, was equally excruciating because I was shown my weakness, I discovered that I can't even trust myself because I am a child of wrath and I am diseased with sin.  After feeling healed by Jesus of my sins, I now truly know the victory of my salvation.  What a joy! I can't begin to describe the weightlessness of my heart and the joy I have all around me.

We went for coffee after the service tonight and it was all I could do to hold myself back from shouting to the entire restaurant the joy of my baptism! I felt like a complete crazy person, and most likely sound like one in this post.   I am unashamed, as nervous as I am to throw this all out there for so many people in my life who don't know the Jesus in me.  This was the heaviest experience I have ever personally experienced. Nothing has compared to this.

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Survival Camp

WAS AWSOME!!!

The first day started out a little rough. I rode on the bus with the kids, and since I was new they wanted to test my boundaries and what they could get away with. It was interesting and I definitely had to use my "big girl voice" a few times.  The trip was beautiful though, and the scenery helped me keep perspective on where I was and what I was doing.  When we arrived, I left the kids at the main center (a dilapidated building at the entrance to the park) and went to help finish setting up camp near the dam.  Little did we know that there were inhabitants already there waiting for us.

Adam, Steyn and I drove up to our 5x5 tent and right into the middle of 5 rhino grazing at the door.  We started unpacking the car, but had to stop and hold very still when the largest of the 5 decided to come and get a closer look.  He was amazing.  and HUGE.  He was about the size of a queen size bed, length and width wise, and 6 feet tall.  Knowing that this animal, now standing 10 feet away from me and looking right in my face, could run at up to 35k per hour, we decided that it was time to take a break from setting up.

The rhino frequented camp only in the night after that evening.  Some of the kids were awoken on Wednesday by grazing right outside their tent door.  One of the girls says that one of them pushed her tent, but I don't believe her lol.

The week was filled with activity. They had challenges to complete within their teams (the class had been broken in to 4 groups of 12) to win their meals. It was great.  By the 3rd day all of the teams fell into great harmony and everything clicked.  The last full day and night were the most amazing.  I was able to head up a medical challenge that I had put together that involved learning how to conserve your energy in the water, how to pull someone out of the water (resistant or cooperative), what to do if you come across an injured camper, how to move an injured person, how to test for spinal injury, and how to perform a litter carry (carrying a stretcher for long distances over rough terrain).  It all happened on the day that they performed an air signal exercise where they had to signal a plane to drop them food by using smoke signals, body signals, and written signs in the grass.  We had a pilot  fly by and drop chocolate easter eggs to the camp that signaled the best- it was incredible to see.  It turned out to be a perfect day of real survival challenges.

The last night we spent around the camp fire playing games and hanging out.  The kids had all gotten over them selves by this time and it was great to watch them discover fellowship with each other.  During that time, Dave received a text message from a friend who has been battling with colon cancer. The man, Duncan, had been on camps with some of the kids so Dave told the group.  He spoke about Duncan's unwavering faith and friendship.  Duncan had been getting treatment at a clinic that had a special type of chemotherapy for his cancer.  He had been trying to avoid the surgery because it would mean he would no longer be able to work in the bush as a guide and creation expert. Unfortunately, the clinic was broken into and the equipment necessary for Duncan's treatment was stolen. He had to make a surgical appointment for Monday. Dave walked away to make a treat for the kids- hot chocolate- and I could tell that the kids needed some kind of closure on the issue. They all had gone from fun and playing games to somber and sad in a matter of moments. I suggested that we pray for Duncan.  What followed was the most moving and sincere 30 minutes of my entire life.  These kids know how to pray. It was incredible.  Some of them had no idea who this man was and were moved to tears by his story and what was happening to him.  We popcorn prayed and there wasn't a single silent student around the fire. Their words were mature and thoughtful and heartfelt.  I was floored.

Check out my facebook album for photos of my life so far:)

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What it looks like...

Here are some photos of what I have been up to.

Here is the door most used in the house- into the kitchen. Steyn and Raveshan are running into the house to try to escape my photo- but I got them.

The whole house centers around the kitchen and here is Steyn setting the table while Jean finished up dinner.

The family room- full of family.  This was a Sunday night that everyone came over for dinner. I felt very much at home with Bruce (David and Jean's son) and Belinda's (his wife) two girls running around, and Kirsti (the oldest daughter) and Justin's (her husband) new baby.
This is my little friend.

Here are the Hillcrest Christian Academy 3rd graders on our way to the Durban Botanical Gardens two weeks ago.

I am going to try a better way of uploading pictures. I have so many that I want to put up, but the way the internet works here is on a per MB basis. I feel badly about using so much internet to put up photos.  We will see. 

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Things I Have Learned So Far...

-Baby zebras are incredibly cute, especially sleeping 5 feet from where you are eating lunch.

-The female Glowing Orb spider, while harmless to most people (some have allergies) can grow to the size of your palm. The male is about the size of a quarter.  You can find both of these living outside the back door.  Surrounded by 10,000 of their children.

-Monkey tastes like roast beef and would probably be yummy on a roll with horseradish and sour cream sauce.

-What South Africans think of Americans.

-How to hear 6 different accents living in one house and understand them all.

-That everyone's families struggle, but love each other like no one's business.

-What Sherry tastes like.

-How to sleep through a confused rooster who insists on thinking 3am is morning enough for everyone to be up.

-How to cook tripe.

-The word 'crap' is considered a swear to some people and they won't necessarily tell you until you've used it so much that they have to say something.

-Enough games to keep 30 1st-3rd graders entertained for at least 30 minutes

-Cricket is a serious game.  Seriously boring.

-Rugby, on the other hand, is AWESOME.

-What it feels like to have random people think the way you speak is beautiful.

-Monkeys are the equivalent of raccoons in the states, only smarter, sneakier, bigger, and harder to catch.

Current Events:

The week was filled Monday through Thursday with Kloof Junior Primary 3rd grade classes joining us at Shongweni Wildlife Reserve for outdoor education, team building, and fun. I got a little sun and feel much better- back to my pre-retirement swim tanned days.  The classes were great and we had a great time teaching them how to make water filters out of sand, stones, and a 2L pop bottle. I was having flashbacks to grade school science class- thanks Mrs. Robinson and Mrs. Binter!  I had a great time.

This coming week is Survival Camp. We are heading 3 hours north to SpionKop Battlefield and Reserve.  It is 4 days with 65 12 year olds.  They have to earn their food- we even bring a dog to search their bags to make sure they didn't bring any! I am in charge of a Medical Emergency Challenge where they have to do a water rescue of a concussion victim.  I am so excited to develop the whole thing and teach them some of the stuff I learned in Wilderness First Response this fall in New Hampshire.  Ill let you know how it goes.

Friday we didn't have any programmes, but I did help Jean sort out the finances for their special needs school for the past year.  I went through her books and bank statements and put together invoices for each of the students that included all fees and transactions for the past year.  It took me all day, but it was a great way to help and I felt like I accomplished something tangible.

I also have been asked to coach a girl from the special needs school in swimming.  She has been chosen to represent South Africa in the Special Olympics in July for the 50 and 100 breaststroke and freestyle.  We have had 2 lessons so far and are going to get serious next week when I get back from camp.  Tomorrow morning (Monday) I am meeting with her and her parents to talk about what to expect from training and to decide on some goals to go after.  We have to fix her breaststroke kick so she won't be disqualified, but other than that- sky's the limit! I am excited to be a part of that every day for the next few months.

Last night (Saturday) Megan (the Padbury's daughter) invited me to go with her and some friends to see their buddies play in a battle of the bands in Durban.  I was more than up for it and didn't ask any questions. On the way there I wondered what type of music we were going to be listening to, so I asked. She told me death metal.  Surprising and not at all what I was expecting, but I was so excited.   I had recently been enlightened to that type of music and like it when I work out or when I want to be loud, but I have never been to a show. We had a great time and I loved it.  I woke up this morning with ringing ears, and I discovered that I don't know how to head-bang, but it was worth it.  I met some really interesting people and would love to go back.  I was not expecting to have God conversations, either, but when people find out I am American and ask what I am doing here, it serves as an incredible opener.  It is amazing how much people will share with me- a stranger who smiles and speaks with an accent they like :)

For now, I am off to church.  I have a lot of praying to do tonight.

ps- Great job yesterday Moose on your triathlon against the Trojans!

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My Sunday Reflections

I have had the whole day today to catch up with myself and with God.

I was listening to a couple sermons from RealityLA that I have missed in the last few weeks of training and traveling.  The most dynamic thing about Reality is that every single sermon points you to remember how much you need God, every minute of every day.  Spending today in reflection led me to think back to the events leading up to, my reasons for, and the goals I have in completing this mission.

I have always been called to serve. Since I can remember I have been battling with a crazy empathy and how crippling it can be in my life.  I have been guilty of neglecting my emotions and spirituality for the sake of others.  For a while after I realized that I was doing this to my own detriment, I hated it.  I struggled, mainly because I would only notice after finding myself terribly hurt and with deep sadness in my heart because time and time again, after having given everything I had to friends and people in my life, I was let down when I needed something in return.  Other times I would feel such incredible emotion on someone else’s behalf.  On one occasion, I remember vividly feeling conflicting emotions from two parties at the same time. It scared me how upset I found myself.

I had just arrived at school to start my junior year after spending the summer at home. We are a big family and I was developing real and adult relationships with my brothers and sisters. My eyes were slowly being opened to the history of my family and the unique pasts of each of its members. I was getting older and had started to become aware of prejudices, resentment, lack of forgiveness, deep hurt, and walls of old feelings, that had always been below my radar as a child.  A lot of change was happening in my family, a lot of growth. By this time my dad had been a recovering alcoholic for 2 years- he started AA just as I was leaving for school my freshman year.  In this process each person in my family did their best to tell him how his drinking hurt them and to give him a chance to apologize. I went into it without anything to present to him myself, but looked at it as an incredible chance for our family to come together around him, as a safe place for honesty and feelings, for reconciliation to take place, and for true forgiveness to work as a healing agent in his relationships.  As I remember it, I was let down.  I saw the hurt in my siblings, and I saw their want for my dad to suffer in them.  I’m afraid the exercise only stirred up feelings that had settled to the bottom of people’s hearts, it did not heal their hearts.

It all fell crashing down on me during a phone call with my dad.  I remember vividly that I sat on the floor in my empty room. I had just gotten off the phone with one of my sisters and couldn’t stand it any longer- the non-acceptance of his apology, the denial of his genuine love.  I didn’t know what else to do but call him immediately and tell him to not give up, to convey to him the deep worry I had that my siblings wouldn’t forgive him.  What then? I don’t remember exactly the words I said to him, but I remember that he was at work and that I was crying so hard that I had to hang up twice because I couldn’t breathe.  Do you remember the last time you cried so hard- like a toddler who just can’t stop, gasping and struggling, until finally you exhaust yourself? The feelings I was having were like a war inside me- between the hurt of my brothers and sisters, and the pleading of my father for forgiveness.

And it doesn’t stop at my family- my struggle with empathy, my faith in people, and my naiveté.  There really isn’t a self-effacing way for me to say this, but please take it as such: I have spent my entire young adult life trying to help people and putting others in front of myself.  There is NO reason to throw a person down, to belittle them, to do anything but help the good causes in their life.  There is NO right way to judge someone or to treat a person as if they are lesser than you.  There is NO reason to laugh in the face of someone’s sin, struggles, past, dreams, goals, or aspirations.  I live by these statements because Jesus has burned them in my heart.  There is no other explanation for it because as a human I am selfish, self-centered, self-absorbed, and self-seeking. Perfect example: I despised my spiritual gift because of what it did to me, how it effected my life, how others feelings were in front of my feelings.  What incredible thoughts from the fallen. How clear is my sin, how obvious are my shortcomings!

A few years ago I got a real taste of what it was like to live in the gospel and finally found the reason for and the source of my empathy. I worked and lived in it and I grew in my faith.  For a short time I was surrounded by joy everywhere I looked. But as my faith grew, so did the temptation of sin in my life, and I did not spiritually prepare myself to take it on. 

It was so easy to compartmentalize my life. My life at home in the suburbs working at church, and its counterpart my life at school in Los Angeles, sports, partying, temptation. I learned what it was to fall, by falling.  More times than I can count- if I ever wanted to.  At one point I read a passage in a C.S. Lewis that punched me square in the jaw:

“God has not been trying to test my faith or love in order to find out their quality. He knew it already. It was I who didn’t. In this trial He makes us occupy the dock, the witness box, and the bench all at once. He always knew that my temple was a house of cards. His only way of making me realize the fact was to knock it down.”

It was exactly how I felt. I was so ashamed. I was so put in my place.  I had taken pride in my ability to stand upright in my faith, to be a pillar, an example.  I did my best to be the best person I could be and when I failed I felt guilt like nothing I have ever experienced in my entire life.  I have let myself down, and I felt like I let God down.

I walked alone in my shame this past semester. I didn’t share it with any of you, I was defiant to the last and held onto the independence that pushed me to trip in the first place.  Even now I am not prepared to share more than that.  Through autumn I lived with what felt like a wall of bulletproof glass between God and me.  I knew He was there, and I wanted to get at Him, but knew I would just let Him down again and again.  It was insecurity, inadequacy, incapacity at its finest. I went to church every Sunday and got smacked around by doctrine that kept me alive week by week. I sat alone in my apartment and cried out asking God to break through the desensitization that I clouded my emotion towards Him.

Looking back I can see that all the time things were happening.  Unhealthy relationships were departing from my life, I was being given a love and loyalty for my home church in LA, and I was accepted to ITeams.  Once that acceptance happened, I felt such a sudden peace.  Not just about making the decision or having the stress of the application process over, but that it was a clear movement of God in my life, for me to come closer to Him.  Everything I had been through was just now a reminder to me- that I needed to die of myself, I needed to pick up my cross and follow Him.

There was one day that I will never forget.  It was a Sunday and another great sermon on forgiveness by Tim Chaddick, our RealityLA pastor.  He said that in our feeling guilty after repentance, in our harboring pain for forgiven sins, we are simply telling Jesus that he was not enough- that his life and his death were not enough.  We are an affront to God and the ultimate sacrifice of His son for us if we do not let go of our sins, but carry the weight of them on our shoulders.  The weight of that load is much too heavy for us to bear- there is no way that you could do it! I left church and put a facebook status up saying “the cross is enough”.  A few hours later I was hanging out with friends and they asked about the meaning of the message.  A 3hour conversation ensued where I had the honor of discussing theology with 2 college men.  I had never seen either of them in a room without television, music, or video games. Only God knows the contents of their hearts, but the door was opened for both of them and it was an incredibly memorable day.  Not only did I have an opportunity to talk about my faith, but it was with two people I care dearly about and who I never would have approached on my own.  It was a great reminder of God’s power, that nothing is impossible or too big for Him.  By the time Christmas break rolled around, things started to fall beautifully into place.  Healthy relationships were growing in strength and meaning, trip plans were coming along, and I was starting to believe that I could do this- but only by the grace of God.

And I am here for that lesson to be branded on my soul.  I wanted this experience to strengthen my heart for Christ, to help me train up a guardian.  Being a Christian is never going to be easy, I will always stumble.  But in taking myself out of anything familiar, in moving away from temptations and separating from my struggles, I have put myself in a place to solely rely on God and His plan for me.  Please know that I am not running away from anything, nothing pushed or scared me away.  I am simply running toward a place of trust.  The experience I have serving God’s kingdom here in South Africa is not mine.  It is God’s for me.  I am trying to understand more fully the meaning of complete reliance.

“You’ll never know that Jesus is all you need, until Jesus is all you have.”

…Shortly after completing this post the internet gave out- which is why this is posted late.  Also a gift that I had brought from home, which was very important to me, was found in ruins today upon my return home from work.  I am getting what I came for…

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